Monday, September 30, 2013

Grabbing Those Horns

We're down to the wire on if Jim will be working tomorrow and it's making me nervous, particularly since I took the bull by the horns Sunday and today in parts of my life.

Learning to stand up and say something to people who are less than honest or are treating me or mine not well is a skill set I'm still working on.

At church I gently confronted someone that had been my friend but started shunning me the moment she found out I was friends with someone that knew her secrets. I've never said a thing to her and treated her like always. I know nothing but I know she thinks I do. Five years of her running away when I say hello is enough, so I told her that I knew why she'd avoided me like the plague and it was unnecessary, even if I knew anything about her secret I wouldn't tell anyone in the first place. Some things, specially things that could negatively impact innocent children, I would never tell.

She insisted that wasn't the case, she'd just been 'busy' Such a lie! But perhaps a lie she needed to tell to keep herself together. Breathe in, breathe out, move on.

Today my confronting things head on didn't go so well. The job I'd been approached about and considered for fell through. I wasn't upset I didn't get the position. I was unhappy that the HR director basically screwed me over in favor of a friend of his. Even the dept head of that dept had been asking him for my application and he ignored her emails, my emails and both of our calls.

It's a disappointment but I'd already developed a zen attitude about the job, deciding if it was meant to be it would happen. But I hate it when people manipulate situations to make it work out just like only they think it should be. Ugh.

I wanted to cry when I heard how it had gone down but I sure didn't want to cry at work so I held it together.

My second reaction was that I wanted to write a nasty accusatory email to the HR director but realized that would be counter productive.

I sure never planned on being on the pointy side of the horns this morning.



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