Thursday, April 24, 2014

Unwanted Attentions & Attitudes

I have to admit that yesterday started off on a very nasty note for me after I viewed a newspaper article about a financial settlement in the case of Pat Cook being murdered by a local police officer. As the story points out, the killer, Daniel Harmon-Wright, has never said he sorry for gunning down this tiny, non-threatening, middle-aged, Sunday School teacher. He has not admitted any wrong doing, still claiming he was in a life threatening situation, which anyone that ever knew Pat knows could never happen.

For many years Pat served at CUMC along with myself and many others. I knew her all too well and have written about what happened to her once Harmon-Wright demanded to see her drivers license. Harmon-Wright only got three years for gunning down a citizen and then lying about it to the State Police during their investigation.

The sick, sad, scary thing I keep bumping up against in the local citizenry is that no one seems to remember or care that there was a living, breathing human that is no longer here due to the wrong actions of another person. Pat's presence is missed by many.

So when I received that first nagging/scolding email from my husband I responded in a very hostile tone and it escalated from there. But it is good, we both did the airing of the grievances and have learned something new about each other, and discussed making big changes we both need. I think that is healthy. But I really shouldn't have taken my agitation over Pat out on him.

When Jim came home I told him about El Creepo Senior Citizen trying to look down my blouse, toying with my necklace and hitting on me, followed by coming home and finding a pile of messages from guys I don't know hitting on me via Facebook messaging. I don't get it, I don't flirt, I'm not skinny, I'm no great beauty and I'm old.

According to a Dating site the necklace thing is acceptable - "Touch a necklace she’s wearing while brushing your fingers on her neck." Let me tell you it is most definitely on the 'Do not do unless you are already emotionally intimate' list. Random guys, do NOT do this to someone you barely know! You might get slapped for your boundary crossing. You doing this without permission of the lady is the first of many steps of violating sexual consent plus it is just creepy as hell.

Which led right to a discussion of Jim saying he knew this guy or that guy had a crush on me and that he would sometimes run into one of my crushees that would ask if we were still married. I had to point out I'd seen some of the ladies from his high school class that still had crushes on him from high school make it obvious they were crushing hard on him at high school reunions. I guess people develop random crushes sometimes and carry them secretly a long time.

I have to say I didn't see much of this in the old world of the Evangelical church. It is very taboo there.

No comments: