Friday, May 30, 2014

And They'd Know We Are Christians By Our Lying, Our Pride and Our Hatred

It's a damn good thing that the insane agita I was feeling coming off that drug has faded because I've cross paths in real life and the internet with the types of Christians that really put my teeth on edge. I'm trying to laugh and be amused but it ain't easy.

A few days ago when I was at the gym I ran into someone I used to know quite well from my old church Possum Creek. This lady, who goes by the name of Janet, was there, getting all up in my space, yet not addressing me at all, just everyone else that doesn't know her, doesn't know her reality or know who she really is.

Janet was eagerly spilling out how much better her life was now that she retired. Granted, there might be a small amount of truth to that.. but... the Janet I know had a hard time making ends meet on the wages from her job, lived in a tiny run down shack of a house that needed serious work, for a long time refused to believe that her husband was raping her eldest daughter. Through the years I've heard Janet gossip-pray, use prayer to bash someone else right in front of them, whine about how unfair it is that she doesn't have a husband now, cling to her youngest daughter to the point where now as an adult the daughter is infantilized - no education and no job living with momma. 

She was pompously holding court in the dressing room about how won-der-fulllllllllll her life is! I know better and I wonder why she didn't simply state 'I'm enjoying retirement' instead of painting this rosy sunny picture that doesn't even come remotely close to the truth.

In our eagerness to present Jesus as the solution to all problems many will lie. How does that honor the deity of your choice?

She was doing this standing next to another Possum Creek member who has bizarre secrets. They nodded and said 'Hi' to me and I bit my tongue, not saying what I wanted to say, "How's your husband that screwed your daughter all those years and Cynthia, how's your son the rapist?"

I resisted, mostly because it wasn't very honoring to Jesus to act like that on my part either. I'm not going to pop their good Christian bubbles.

And then yesterday on my way to my physical therapy at Johns Hopkins I had to wade through this mess by another bashing and hating set of Christians - Turning Away From Johns Hopkins I always wanted to drive through a screaming angry mob of any race, not. I asked at Bayview who they were and why they were there, but no one working at Hopkins seemed to know. Some protest.

Not much love and acceptance going on in the world of Christians, is there? I'm not feeling it, but then again I'm kind of a shut in with my health problems. But I try to love on those in my path and before getting to Hopkins had a quick pleasant visit with the homeless guy near the hospital and dropped off some things for him. I am finding I have more love, respect, positive interactions with the 'heathens' of this world. That's a sad statement.

I am beginning to realize that being kicked outside the safe walls of modern Christianity is probably one of the best things that could have happened to me for the sake of my own spirituality and growth.

All reminds me of one of my favorite songs by Jason Upton - Lullaby For A Petrified Sacred Society.


Persephone said...

Suzanne, you might want to do some rephrasing in the John Hopkins paragraph.

Calulu said...

Thanks for the warning Persephone. ANY group of people screaming and ranting in those numbers scares the crap out of me. Edited