Friday, April 10, 2015

Stomach Aches and Head Aches

Tomorrow morning as soon as my housesitter (aka one of my kids) gets here we're gone. It cannot come soon enough because today has brought some serious weirdness.

Jim's been working from home today and that meant my final packing and cleaning was impacted, but a worse impact was that we picked up salads from our local grocery store around noon and now both of us are wiped out with stomach cramps and riding the porcelain throne. Would rather have the iron throne if I had a choice. Yeah, some sort of mild food borne illness from the salad bar. Add in throwing out my back, a gall stone attack and what seems to be likely urinary tract infection plus Jim's assorted bones and groans and we'll be limping off the plane to flake out on the beaches of Costa Rica.

I went around and talked to some of our closer neighbors about joining our lawsuit against the HOA but no one wants to rock the boat  at all. They just want to complain about the fact that we haven't had a legitimate audit or financial statement from the HOA in ten years. When we get back from the trip I'm going to start knocking on doors and trying to add others to the court petition. I know this will mean war with the treasurer. She's already sent us threatening emails in the last few years when we've asked for the financials so I'm thinking I might end up having to take out a restraining order against her before this is over. Getting access to the financial statements just should not be this difficult, our bylaws on file at the courthouse say that any member can receive a copy upon request.

There are roughly 7 households I know will join us, but the other 70 I have no idea for sure. 3 will be a no and the rest, who knows..Not looking forward to the hours of research on who owns the rentals and going door to door to get names to join the suit. It's going to be daunting.This mess has been going on for over five years now - time to go to court.

It would be different if the treasurer before this one hadn't stolen 100K from the HOA and not been legally charged. This is getting insane. Cough up the financials and this wouldn't even be an issue. Why so evasive and defensive?

The other pretty sad thing that happened was that I got an email from my sister in law, a wonderful, kind, compassion, all-around great gal named Karen. My Maw In Law is living in a retirement home near Karen and Jim's brother. My Maw In Law has developed dementia, it's been happening for quite a while and her health, which has been not good for three years now, seems to be taking a turn again.

Three years ago in January I really thought we were going to lose her. Jim went down and stayed with her for three weeks as she bounced in and out of the hospital. We were told she had lung cancer and had at most six months. Here we are, three years, some months and two retirement village moves later and she's still ticking like a Timex watch in those old commercials.

But the dementia is worse again. She's stopped taking baths, will not change her clothes or wash them. At her new retirement home the other residents are complaining about her wearing the same pair of adult diapers for days on end and smelling really really bad. She has another oozing chest situation going on that has happened off and on since her breast cancer. Rather than get a nurse to clean and bandage this large oozy spot my Maw In Law cut a piece off her flannel pajamas and used another bit of dirty cloth to bind it over the wound.

My poor sister in law is at the end of her rope dealing with the Maw In Law. And it turns out that the Maw In Law is defending all of her choices to ignore basic hygiene rules because... wait for it... drum roll please.... IT COSTS MONEY!!!!!!1111111eleventity!!!

Karen wants Jim to talk to her, since she does listen to Jim, and insist she not worry about money and cooperate with the staff at the retirement home in all their attempts to keep her clean.

When all this was happening at the other retirement place Bob and Karen were insisting that the staff wasn't doing their job. Now that the Maw In Law is five minutes away they are starting to see that the issues are more complex than that. I told Karen that I believe that it's time to put Maw In Law in the locked dementia ward as she's clearly not capable of doing any self care.

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