Saturday, February 20, 2016

Are You Loathesome Tonight?

Our son Andy stopped by this morning on his way to pick up his car. He's had my car and my gas credit card for a few weeks while his was in a local body shop getting fixed up from his recent wreck. As always it was wonderful to see him, and we got to hang out before going out for lunch and my loading him down with fresh bread and apple pie to take home.

That young man, like his sister Laura, is a joy to see!

After he left I fell into a deep no-sleep and food coma, flaking out on the sofa for a lengthy nap. Trying to catch up on my sleep deficit. Not sure it's going to help me get to sleep tonight.

Once Jim started doing his Saturday night thing, talking to his momma, I have a hint that tonight's going to be another sleepless night. He opened up to his mother about the problems we experienced back at Christmas time with his brother and the brother's new wife. Maw In Law says she's going to ask the brother about it.

This makes me extremely nervous, just like the emails Jim recently sent to his brother spelling out all the ways we were mistreated during the Christmas trip. The brother's only response has been that he didn't have time at the moment to go into it but would respond eventually. That's right, he's kicking the problem down the street again. I predict there will be no response beyond that one.

I'd really rather not have the Maw In Law involved at all. But it is curious that considering the brother lives mere minutes from Maw In Law he's not been to see her in well over a week. I think we need to press moving her here to Virginia. That's just not right.

These are exactly the kinds of things that wake me up, keep me awake and cause the tossing and turning. Which is stupid because if there's one thing I've learned in my 55 years on thise planet it's that you cannot force anyone else to change, or explain themselves, or interact with you once they've decided not to.

I'm still just so done with my brother and sister in law, but I'm not going to stand in Jim's way if he wants to have a relationship with them. It's going to take longer for me to come around.

Another reason to be happy I'm no longer part of my old church because I'd be under tremendous pressure to forgive immediate all this that's been building the last thirty years. Forgiving someone does not mean immediately letting them back into your life to wreck havoc anew. I prefer to forgive yet take a step back to keep from things continuing or escalating even further.

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