Tuesday, May 24, 2016

A Stab at Normalcy

Things are starting to settle down again, apologies issued, breakfast in bed happening along with copious discussions, a few very expensive presents and I'm finding that I'm not so angry any longer. I just want to move past last week and pretend it didn't happen. So I am.

Jim's been tormenting himself with guilt way more than I could torture him if I were so inclined. It's pretty terrible to watch. Just experiencing how badly shaken up he is sort of melts my hard feelings away. I've chosen to forgive, but still make sure he stays on the right path.

Today I went to one of the nearby quilting stores that I shop at to get a few more fabrics for a present I'm working on for someone. We've been discussing my perhaps working there a few hours a week, but it's a longer commute than I'd like so I pretty much told the shop owner that I've have to have at least a five hour stretch in the shop three or so times a week before I'd consider it.

What did come out of it is that I'm going to be making some shop samples, small projects, and selling some of my quilts out of the shop. I came away with a pile of fabrics straight out of the shipping box to work on! One is darling! A Mexican Day of the Dead fabric with dogs being dressed up for the holiday. It's so bizarre and so cute at the same time.

The owner had also seen my cat butt coasters I'd crocheted and ordered a set. The lady at the yarn shop across the street heard about them and ordered a set as well. So I'm going to be busy and that's good because busy keeps you from dwelling on sadness.

As I was driving home I took a short cut through old town. I was sad to see that one of the ladies I loved at my old church is selling her home in the historical section of town. She's older than I and she also grew up in the greater New Orleans area. We bonded over that. I haven't seen her for at least two years before I left the old church and she'd been one of those folks I would love to see again.

That huge restored Victorian house was her pride and joy. I can only imagine she's selling it because she can no longer afford the upkeep or she's tired of rattling around alone inside. Hers is one of the more tragic stories from our old church. Once she hit menopause she ended up with her days and nights very mixed up. You stopped seeing her out and about much less at church, when you did talk to her she was very spacey-loopy and talked about not sleeping for days. I always suspected she had some sort of undiagnosed mental illness, her mother battled mental illness for years before disappearing into the French Quarter. But that's another sad tale for another day.

About two years before we left the church, 11 years ago, I once saw her husband the church elder at a service and I asked him about his wife Sue. He grumbled that if one more person asked where his wife was he'd leave church and never return. He did and no, he hasn't return. He divorced Sue after many years of marriage and now he's an agnostic I discovered after a long conservation at the farmers market. He's remarried.

Sue doesn't answer phone calls and she doesn't return messages either. I tried a number of times to reach out to her both before and after leaving the old church. But eventually I just gave up. I hope she's alright. I'd call but I don't wish to intrude. I wouldn't know what to say.

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