Thursday, September 29, 2016

Tough Day

Comcast, asthma and blood sugars. It's been a hell of a day. Warning: salty language and complaining ahead.

I'm having some troubles settling into taking my metformin because now it's lowering my blood sugar levels too low. I've had to add carbs back into my diet to keep my blood sugar level around 100. Hard core. I guess this means most of the blood sugar problems are more related to meds reactions, my asthma meds. The only time they spike now is when I use certain asthma meds. Going back to the research doc on Monday and we're going to have to talk about this. It ain't gonna be a pleasant talk.

This morning was hell going to the grocery store all because the cashier decided to douse herself in a heavy dose of whatever kind of cheap cologne she wears. I started having an immediate asthma attack as I was checking out, had to ditch the transaction, leaving Jim to buy the groceries and get out to the car, where I was medicating within a half minute of the attack started. My day was totally fucked after that point. I was wacked from the meds and lack of oxygen. Read two books today and lolled around wheezing with low oxygen levels.

I have two friends with chronic health conditions in my age group that have started speaking with an increasing frequency of ending it all. After the last ten years of severe asthma that can be triggered by things as simple as someone that has recently eaten peanuts standing near me, someone lighting up a cigarette within ten feet of me, certain cleaning solutions used near me, or one of the worst bugaboos - someone wearing the wrong perfume/cologne walking past I totally get the thoughts of suicide. It starts to look like an alternative to the constant illness and limitations of your body.

When your daily life is riddled with the inability to do simple things, like make the groceries, or go out in a crowd, you start to crave an ending to it all. You wonder why the fuck you're still here and why you fight so damn hard to stay alive. Life starts to feel pointless, and doing simple things, like a trip to the beach, start to take on the planning of a spy mission or military action. Everything you might possibly need to protect your health, you have to travel when the fewest number of folks will be flying/driving with you. You contact the hotel with a long list of ADA accommodations. You travel with so many prescription drugs, equipment and whatnots that you wonder why TSA doesn't look askance at that huge old pile of drugs. Oh yeah, you cannot traffic and sell asthma meds, although I could probably get a good thousand bucks for the three epipens I keep on me at all times.

You wonder if it's all worth it.

Comcast started working what was left of my nerves by merely decided yet again that I have one of their modems and sent me a letter saying that I was going to be billed for it. There's only one problem. I haven't had a Comcast modem for over ten years now. Every year or so someone at Comcast decides I do, starts billing me for this imaginary modem until I call them up and insist I don't have one. They've done this so many times now that today I came to the conclusion after talking to friends having the same issue with Comcast that they are likely doing it to rip folks off. This is their version of the Wells Fargo opening bogus accounts. I cannot wait until I can cancel my Comcast account at the first of the year when we move overseas. I think I'm going to file a complaint over this with the Consumer Protection Agency. 

You're griping a lot tonight, I hear you say, so did anything good happen? Yeah, there have been good things lately. Yesterday we spent a rainy afternoon at the movie theater watching 'Sully'. We were at the beach last week. Jim had his 65th birthday and I got him a customized greeting video from a guy that does BeeGees parodies. I got to hang out with one of my instant sisters/close friends. But yesterday I had one of the biggest laughs I've had in quite a long time in our local Petsmart.

I went to pick up an herbal spray to keep the cats out of my bathroom because one of them, and I cannot determine which one it is, thinks that the fuzzy bathmat is the perfect place to take a dump. The litter box can be immaculate and someone is still sneaking to poop on the bathmat once a week or so.

When I came into the store I stopped to look at the display of bearded lizards and experienced a thing I'd never seen before. ALL of the lizards in the display rushed forward to the glass and were STARING intensely as they pushed against the glass. Guess what the object of their fascination was? My purse, my burgundy, green purse that is embroidered with gold, silver and copper thread. They were dazzled by the shiny things. It was pretty funny. Odd, I never thought lizards were attracted to shiny baubles like that. 

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