The Sea is a Salty One

  The chickens here haven't been smoking, but I'm tempted to...and I don't smoke. Ever. Couple of days ago, Jim started complaining about the fact that he's still oozing something, not quite blood, not urine. His bladder finally woke up and realized it had a real job to do and the random peeing ended. Not a moment too soon as I have a threadbare set of sheets and a twenty year old quilt so drab and faded it's been washed so many times on the bed.  Haven't even started on the linens in the guest house yet and it's been two and a half weeks! I'm slacking, stress, constant medical confloptions, peeing, the dying of my dryer, my back, the phases of the moon, voodoo doll making have distracted me! I have also been distracted from eye balling Jim's incision. He had the metal staples removed a week ago. He started asking me to take a look. I finally did and a three inch long section of his incision has opened up. Doctor said its open two inches deep. So he...

  Well, I am not from f*cking Memphis but its been this kind of a night and day. Last night Jim drug me to his church to the Valentine's Day dinner. I wasn't best pleased by this, but I went to keep the peace. Besides sometimes very amusing things happen. They did! The good: My favorite local math teacher greeted me in the food line by asking me if I was ready for 'authentic Mexican food'? As I told him I am always ready for authentic Mexican food. His tacos were better than any of the local taco places, even the expensive ones. The bad: I had to keep fending off folks that wanted Jim and I to take this poor old dog that was Velma's. I kept having to explain over the course of yesterday and yesterday evening anew to folks about my dog dander allergy. The ugly: Shortly after arriving one of the church members sidled up with the pastor a few mere feet in front of me and started trying to engage in him speculating over another member's possible wealth. Kudos to the...

  My chicken-y clucked up kitchen. Stuck there today washing beaucoup laundry. Jim got home on Friday evening in one piece. I did and did not come home in one piece. I drove at night, something I hate to do because my night vision isn't real good, and waiting in a secluded dark road. Jumpy until he got off the bus and into the car. However I did manage to drive there and back much better than I thought I might. Plus for an added bonus it was all 'No molestar!' and not one person hassled me at the bus stop. Then he proceeded to leak blood and urine over every surface in the house. Think I'm kidding? I have a dozen Walter White-style tighty-whities soaking in the laundry room! Apparently it takes a bit to get full functionality back in your urinary tract system. Here's the rub about everything that has happened. His wonderful talented urologist failed to warn us about the extent of these side effects. I endlessly read through everything on prostate cancer on websites ...

  A rooster coming up over our wall. This morning I dropped my husband Jim off at the Tamarindo Airport for a flight to San Jose and his doctor's office. Today is staple and catheter removal day! Praying it goes well. I hated missing it, but the asthma is bad, and I'm just emotionally wrung out by the last four months. Simple check up it's not essential I be there for. Per my kids demands he flew down on Sansa Air, and he's having to bus back in the sole bus line that runs through Huacas, the nearest town of any size near us. Airline had no available seats on the afternoon flights. I wanted to drive down, but my family threatened to fly down again if I did. I still think we would be fine, but.. a promise is a promise. Got such a kick out of the airport because the waiting area is open air like most of Costa Rica. A zinc wavy metal roof on metal poles over a scant few benches. What tickled me was the flock of chickens casually browsing through the waiting room. The airpo...

  The names in the title refer to a Chinese restaurant and the next door bakery that we pass on our way to San Jose. This is the Teatro Nacional across the street from our room in the Hilton. Too fancy for me~ Wow, I have to tell you that this has been two of the most stressful weeks in my life, from hobbling around to clean on my stupid ankle problems, all the way to recovery at the house with the husband after my family left. I'm not entirely kidding when I say the bedroom floor has had blood, sweat, tears, vomit, pee and worse on it in the last week. Our family arrived and it was off to San Jose, to the hospital that is a preferred provider for my insurance. The doctor's office fubbed up, no pre authorizations were obtained, nothing, de nada, nyet! I spent a very borderline sweary sweaty hour clearing it up, and the surgery took place once I put 80% of the surgery on my AmEx as a downpayment in case the insurance company denied it. We were told the surgery was one to two hou...

  View from our San Jose hotel room, a strange place with a frosted glass shower and toilet area which assured everyone in the hotel room viewed your junk when you showered or tried to use the toilet. Go figure! I do want to talk about our time in San Jose with the surgery, but it's an involved tale with lots of moving parts for another day. Some of them fecal-covered moving parts. Today I wanted to rant about something that's going to make me struggle not to be an ugly twat-waffle to the pastor of my husband's church and those who are part of the men's group tomorrow. Why? Read on dear one. Just over a year ago my husband had a rupturing gall bladder removed, and I encountered that same awful thing that used to happen at my old toxic Evangelical non-denom church. Church members being ridiculously buttinski during medical situations, planned or emergency. I ended up taking my husband's phone away from him and shutting it off until after he got out of the hospital. H...

  Raining or tears? Same thing? Oh man, I have yelled and cried already this morning and many times yesterday. Just got off the phone with several hotels in the San Jose area, all I've stayed at, after a fruitless week long discussion in email about the reservations. I made the mistake of calling, 17 times to the hotel of choice, hung up on, endlessly shunted around, until I finally got a guy who said they were booked solid. I went to their website and saw that was not exactly true. A truism in Costa Rica is if you are dis-conveniencing a Tico in a business situation they will suddenly tell you something false to get you off the phone. Experienced this many times. I blame the rise of the American Karens for this! I booked online, I could not get two rooms for my kids but I did score a room with enough beds for everyone. Crazy tourist season pricing too. If they are pissed off about the lack of space I will be staying in the hospital and leaving them the room. Yesterday I was doing ...

  It's hot! It's grapefruit season again with my tree in front of the window loaded down with the ripe fruit. Every afternoon is a loud raucous parrot party in the tree top. They love ripe citrus. In the past week things have finally shaken out. Jim picked surgery, the thing recommended by our doctors as his poison du jour instead of radiation and/or chemotherapy. I am glad. He does not decide things quickly. Surgery on Friday. Once he had a surgery date I swung into action letting various family members know. We start picking them up on Wednesday at the local airport before driving late Thursday into San Jose for the surgery.  Tomorrow I finalize hotel arrangements. I had to wait to hear how many days Jim will be in the hospital. I'm going to try and book again at Balmoral. Weird name, beautiful hotel. Closest to the hospital and on that lovely pedestrian mall where I can consume gallons of Starbucks. I understand why we're having visitors then. Family members are worr...

  Snow walking with Kiki. I miss him so much! Friends of mine complaining about this winter storm. It's not the dreaded Snowmageddon but its close from the looks of it. Makes me miss the best part of winter, that first really hard serious snow. It would kill all the mold and tamp down dust. I would go out for a long tramp outside in the snow at midnight because I could breathe all the way down to the bottom of my lungs. My kitty Kiki would join me, even if the snow was more than a foot deep. We'd trot along in a beautifully frozen world without a single soul stirring.

 Calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean with normally hidden rocks emerging from the ocean. Sort of like now for me. I've popped a weird allergic reaction to a yeast infection treatment and it's physically making me miserable. I'm upset and jumpy over the future, worrying about all three of my kids, and, of course my husband. Feverish and suddenly asthmatic. Several days ago I went b!tch monkey rogue on Twitter towards much of the Anti KJ community after some fringe people going real life on me. Family members of mine with zero connection to my writing life had started to receive real life harassment. I should know by now that if I feel that upset I usually have something health wise on the way. I likely should shut up, even if I meant every single word to spill from my mouth and fingers. Burned the bridge. the mofoing house and the barn down at the same time. Today was hard because my husband is starting to freak out over what the doctor is saying about the surgery and treatment...

  Yes, I was there this morning! One of the things that's been messing with my emotions for the last six months, or so has been keeping my mouth shut when others behave in stupid manners. My filter is 100% broken now and I told more than a few folks off over the last few days.  I made the decision to just completely leave big parts of the internet behind and finish my damn book. One of the things that has taken so long with the book is that I changed the entire direction of the book and am rewriting huge sections now. I'm just simply no longer as angry with the folks in my old church. Does no good to expose who was boinking who and who smoking meth behind the chapel. Plus my editor Mr. Eagle Eye has been putting me through the wringer on large parts of it, suggesting splitting that chapter, elaborating more here, explaining there and it's been screwing with my internal cha-cha slide. Add in the discussions and worrying over the husband's cancer diagnosis and the temper ...

  For once I am not chasing down Albuterol! It was Jim that had the medical confloptions, and boy did it illustrate the huge flaws in the US healthcare system and the one we're now used to in Costa Rica! We flew in nearly a week ago for a family Christmas. Traveling was mostly copacetic, with the exception of TSA in Charlotte. Got an extremely invasive pat down and TSA put the bin with our laptops in it back into circulation. Lost the laptops for 20 minutes. We had to run to catch our flight after the delay at the security checkpoint over the computers. But the real fun started when we got up the next morning. Jim's cat scratch was much more infected. He could not use his hand. The swelling was hideous. So off we go to urgent care. Three hours later he is seen and told he has to have rabies shots at the local hospital. Off to the hospital we go where we.... .....wait .....wait .....and wait some more! It takes six hours to be seen for the first time. This is a huge contrast wit...

Merry Christmas, or whatever holiday you are celebrating. Pick one. Tomorrow I fly to the States with the hubby. Today he pops up with more mrsa. The only good thing of today is that our doctor leaned on him to wear a mask and stop trying to pet stray kitties. He got scratched hard on Sunday for picking up one of the random strays that come eat at our feral colony feeding we do. It got him but good. He was oozing pus and his hand smelled weird. The good news is that rabies have been eradicated in Costa Rica, so he's not having to get the series of painful injections in his stomach. I ran around like a maniac today trying to find my blood pressure med. None of the supply houses here have it. It's disappeared nation wide. Going off patent into the whole generic thing and I'm caught in the several months this is happening in. Last month Price Smart set me up with the individual drugs that make it up, but it's kind of a pain to haul around multiple pills in place of the one...

  Has nothing to do with last night, but it was the only photo involving dancing I still have in my funny stuff. Somewhere floating around in my images is a photo of me dressed as a ballerina for my own dance recital. I wish I could find it because my hair is truly tragic, teased into an enormous beehive sporting enough Aqua Net to open up its own hole in the ozone layer. I've been cleaning like a fiend in preparation for my house sitter, but last night we took a break. I wasn't wild about the idea but I was glad I went. We went to the end of the academic year dance recital for one of Jim's students, a sweet high school girl name Mariguana. In many ways it was just like recitals in the US. proud parents rushing up to take close ups of their children dancing, moms and dads sporting tees with the name of the dance studio with "Dance Moms" or "Dance Dads" on them. The kids did a variety of styles that weren't routinely taught when I was a kid in the Jur...

  Sunset at Braselito where I never walk any longer after finding out that the fish market and some of the nearby shacks dump their waste straight in the ocean. I always wondered why their beach stunk! So I'm so over my last week of outrage at Vada Jade for art plagiarism, and tired of the games played on all sides. I am blocking both because when *coughcoughsharlacough and Nonsense show up there can be no rationality, just more petty feuds. Go pound sand you guys! Had a shock the other day that I'm still trying to navigate. Our new housesitter expects to stay in the house, not the guesthouse, so I'm about to have to be very ugly about this and say guesthouse or no housesitting and lock the place, set the alarms and put the catfood on a timed feeder.. I don't mind if she uses the hot tub, the sauna or the pool, just not the house! I'm still shaken up over what happened this summer. Still to this day I find things completely ruined by the last housesitter and those a...

  Original acrylic painting by myself done entirely with a palette knife of a photo I took of sunset looking towards Playa Langosta. Yesterday I did something rather out of character for me, but not entirely. For the last year or better I've sat on my personal opinion of someone in the Katie Joy WOACB Anti community, a gal that goes by the online moniker of Vada Jade. No longer, I did a video on YouTube outlining what plagiarism is in the art world. It's a good distraction from the fact that we just discovered via additional tests that Jim has a few cardiac issues that potentially impact his cancer treatment. Vada approached me a few years ago out of the blue on that same reach out and try to touch me bad touch edition platform - Facebook. All the oddballs use Facebook messenger to reach out to me. She acted in turns like she knew me, and did some random trauma dumping, all the while attempting to get some positive strokes. She seemed desperate to gain my approval for her abou...

  What a horrid last few days! Friday night we went to see a local little dinner theater production. Christmas in a place that never feels like Christmas. I went because I figured I needed to make an appearance around Jim's ridiculous church friends. I had my game face on, I knew the production would be goopy, gooy, sentimentalism, I was prepared for that. I knew the person making the meals and figured it would be just okay. I just didn't count on it being tamales steamed in palm leaves, arriving smoking with palm leaf fumes. Instant asthma. Very allergic to palm leaves. Here usually they are steamed in banana leaves, not palm leaves. I ate nothing more than two spoonfuls of the dessert, which was cloyingly sweet I could barely choke it down. No matter, Inhaler, drugs and the beat goes on.  This is what happens when you make an allergic to food claim too, many many times! Sometimes it involves someone dosing you with your allergen to see if you are actually allergic to that fo...

 I swear I need to do the above because I sleep off to the side almost to the edge on my side and my husband sleeps like he's battling a drunk octopus while trying to don a tight girdle! If I don't get to sleep first I might as well give up, or go sleep in the guest room because there's no sleep until he falls asleep. Since the cancer diagnosis there's not been as much sleep on either side, his or mine. We got some rather bad news this week. He has mrsa. The infected spots on the legs have gone haywire, and now he's the one getting scraped and squeezed at the clinic, not I. Freaked out when they confirmed it was mrsa and went straight into crazy mrsa protocol that my old infectious disease doctor drilled into me 8 years ago during my long bout fighting it. Clorox wipes wiping down every single thing from light switches to knobs to remote controls to you name it you might have touched. Our laundry is separated out, I'm blasting the hell out of his clothing, towel...

  Crab mysteriously showed up in the swimming pool a mile and a half from the ocean. This last week makes about as much sense. I feel like I should be mounting a "We Survived Church Thanksgiving Dinner!" bumper sticker on the rear of the old blue Kicks. Hostility, indigestion and turkey go so incredibly well together, don't you think? Thanksgiving Day was a hard one. We got up and Jim had to go to the clinic. Running a fever, a couple of different spots oozing pus and blood all over the sheets. It's a vicious cycle. Jim gets bug bites here, scratches and presto-chango you got staph infections. It was indeed. Culturing, cleaning out and gross medical things done and sent home to prepare for a turkey day feast at the church. I was already tense because it was exactly two weeks since Jim's biopsy and we're heard nothing, plus making 4 dozen deviled eggs for a potluck at the last second was a new level of misery involving a misfiring pastry bag and eggs that simpl...

  And I wish I was that woman buying beer. If only my medications for mastocytocis didn't inhibit me from drinking. Told Jim yesterday and today I wished I could wash my mouth and my brain out with tequila. Alas no. What happened? It's complicated. Jim and his new church, the place that loves to advertise itself as ' That little Christian revival in the jungle! ' Ugh, I feel dirty just typing that out! He's on the board as an elder and is all in, going so hard like I did during my years at Possum Creek where he was the unsure one not getting with the program. This time it's me. I just know too much about how these places operate now. I've been with him there, but it's clearly not my scene at all. They are all trying so furiously to summon up a IHOP KC, or TACF type revival with folks rolling on the ground, screaming for FIRE! and laughing type emotional revival. I did that stuff back in the 1990s and half of the 2000s and have zero desire to revisit it. ...