Breaking Better


The last month has been struggle, and I've not wanted to dump that on any readers. Why? Me coming to terms with the fact that I was told I probably had MS and it was thalamic stroke instead and I wasn't referred  to the neuro in time enough to recover lost function. It was a dishearteningly hard pill to swallow along with the news that I had old thalamus damage likely from a stroke in utero. 

Lots of hard ugly crying mixed with self pity there for the last month. Plus it took me awhile to get okay enough with this to tell family members. Processing takes time.

I won't bore you with the physical details. I've had issues my entire life that relate to the first thalamus damage, now I have more. Big effing deal, I'm still very fortunate compared to others, I have access to great healthcare and have the gold standard health insurance. They've switched around my medications and I'm doing better now.

Jim is Jim and he's enmeshed with his fantasy football preparations. I keep hearing an AI generated voice from his computer saying inanities like "Good choice!" or "That's too bad" during his new new favorite hobby mock fantasy football drafts. Here comes football season, stealing him away.

One of the funnier and odder things that has happened recently is that we were having something of a bonding experience over a television show. He's been struggling with what they thought was Covid but many tests later turned out to be merely one of those flu strains that makes you feel like dirt for a month. During this time of him feeling like dirt and my own internal weeping over the confloption that is my body I started rewatching "Breaking Bad" from the beginning.

I had seen it during its original run, starting to watch just at the beginning of season three on my son's recommendation. Had to catch up by watching seasons one and two. So I'd not seen it in order. 

I realized during episode one season one that Jim didn't automatically dismiss it as sex & violence like so much tv. He left his desk, sidled on over, and started watching. Our days/nights turned into two and three episode "Netflix and Chill" sessions with the hours in between being filled with discussions of the show, and some of the larger themes, healthcare in the U.S., wealth inequality, immigration, drugs, you name it. Like I said some sort of bizarre bonding experience.

When I left to spend a week with our kids in the Greater DC area we had just started the first episode of season there. He asked if it was okay if he watched ahead, and I told him fine, I'd catch up when I got home. I got home and there were a mere three episodes left in the entire series. Jim binged seasons three, four and all the way to the end of season five. Damn, that is a lot of tv in a mere week!

We watched the final few episodes, which lead to another series of discussions. I still haven't seen more than few moments of "El Camino" because older Jesse reminds me too much of my son and it's almost painful to watch Jesse get tortured. But we're now moving on into the very different world of "Better Call Saul" I think Jim's going to start gorging on this one too, leading to other long talks about the state of our world.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Missed Stompism

One anecdote I neglected to pass on that had Jim and I puzzling and laughing. Stompy, Jim and I were talking about her upcoming European trip when she mentioned she was going to be in Amsterdam a few days. I squeal and tell her had I know I would be loading her with money and a shopping list for the Van Gogh museum. I really, really, REALLY want that entire set of sweet Samsonite with his almond blossom painting on it. She turns to us and tells sue she's going to the Sex Museum instead. Oh holy crap!
Read more

Bottomless Betty and Blocking the Aunt Heap

Image
  The Chesapeake Bay Bridge last weekend. So where have I been? Back to Louisiana and then up to Maryland. I wanted to check on my mother in her assisted living. It didn't go well at all, even if I stayed ten days. One of my aunts in the Aunt Heap nicknamed my mother 'Bottomless Betty' after she suddenly developed the inability to wear bottoms at all, no pants, no panties, no skirts. It was most bizarre and had a sudden onset. Her dementia has gone haywire in the few months she's been in assisted living. I'm not entirely sure she knew who I was either. This was a shock, her mental status slid so fast it was scary. Did what I could, talked to the folks in the admin office seeking a way to help her. My mother's doctor had tried a drug to slow the dementia but all it did was cause my mother to hallucinate.   Got home on Tuesday night, taking that long airplane ride from Washington, DC to my home near Tamarindo, Costa Rica. Human Greek chorus and alarmist member of...
Read more

Strange Days and Orchids

Image
Water feature from the Orchid Garden near San Jose. Well, it's been a strange week or two. I've lost days to this silly ankle thing. Took off the boot at a week to start doing physical therapy movements, made it two days and now the boot is back on and I'm down to two pain pills. It's healing so slowly this time. Have to do a medical follow up this week. Several days ago we went to a party for a lady we know who is throwing in the towel and going home to the U.S.A. Katie was trying to do that thing that is impossible here on the Gold Coast -- live as a gringo without a steady monthly income. Even a social security pension will not cut it here. It's expensive, but likely not as expensive as life in the U.S.A. is getting lately. Read that there has been a 40% jump in the price of vegetables and fruits last month. Deporting the folks that do all the grunt work there was one very bad idea mixed with those insano tariffs. We have high tariffs here and it inhibits the amo...
Read more